Friday, December 25, 2009

Peace, Christmas, and International Education



This is the thing about an International English Institute....when you get students together from all over the world, the only way they can communicate is in English.  This takes effort, deep listening, eye contact, charades, thought, laughter, and compassion.  What a lesson in communication!  If we all, who speak the same language, gave our conversations the same care.

It is unbelievably touching to see a Korean, male, 24 year old cry at our weekly graduations as he bids farewell to his friends he made from Brazil, Switzerland, Italy, Germany, and more.  It is moving to hear the students speak of how the teachers have taught them more than English and have given them the memories of their lives. 

Yesterday we celebrated the upcoming Christmas holidays.  While not everyone celebrates Christmas, part of the experience of coming to America is to be immersed in all the traditions of American life.  And truly, what does "Merry Christmas" mean, but a greeting of peace, joy, love and hope? 

We like to sing an American song at our Friday graduations, and yesterday Marcia's class came up to help lead "Santa Claus is Coming to Town."  We followed this with  "Silent Night" in English, and then invited the Brazilians to sing the song in Portuguese.  They were so happy and their voices were bright and joyous.  A realization:  we sing the same songs, all over the world, in different languages, but with the same meaning. 

I learned a new quote yesterday:  "Begin anywhere.  But begin."

Monday, December 21, 2009

Happy Birthday Mommy


Dearest Mommy,
How I wish I could call and hear you say "Hi Bobs." 
Always a wise listener, always knowing how to make me feel loved and special, always instilling in me the strength to keep marching onward with trust and a life-affirming belief.  Please give me a sign....Happy Birthday.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

WOLF


I have always been drawn to the wolf, especially since visiting a 'shaman' in Half Moon Bay and discovering that the wolf is my animal spirit / guide.  Maybe it is the way the wolf howls from the bottom of her heart as she stretches toward the full moon.


Lately, I have been holding onto some uncomfortable feelings.  So, it was fortuitous that I picked up a book by Pema Chodren, one of my favorite Buddhist authors, last night while sitting at Borders.  Her book began with a story....


"A Native American grandfather was speaking to his grandson about hurt, sadness, and cruelty and how it comes about.  He said it was if two wolves were fighting in his heart.  One wolf is vengeful, bitter, and angry.  One wolf is understanding, open, willing and kind.  'Which wolf will win the fight?' asked the child.  The grandfather answered, 'The one that wins is the one I choose to feed."

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

KEYS


Yesterday I set my keys down on the counter at CVS Pharmacy while paying the friendly cashier.  "Wow, you have a lot of keys," he said.  I stopped.  I was clearly moved by this comment.  My mind flew back in time....

In 2003 I was left with an "empty nest" and no clear direction of where life would take me.

Then, I discovered a certificate program in teaching English as a Foreign Language at San Diego State.  Within a couple of months, I scattered my belongings among friends, emptied my apartment, donated all of my self-help books to the Los Gatos library, graduated the class at SDSU, and prepared to leave for Mexico....and the unknown.  Only one key left, to my little Dodge Neon.  Linnie, my constant companion on my wanderlust adventures , drove with me to Frontier Ford to dispose of my car and hand over my final key.  I was keyless.  I didn't have a key in all the world!

I moved to Cuernavaca, Mexico for what turned out to be an almost two year journey of self-reliance, survival, new connections, learning, peace, growth and fulfillment.

I returned to San Francisco in 2005.  Since then, I have lived so many places as I continue to trust that the universe unfolds, exactly as it should, and I am exactly where I should be, and that everything I need will find its way to me.

So here I am at CVS Pharmacy, in San Diego, December 2009, once again with lots of keys. 

I look back with awe at that special time when I had no keys at all.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Joshua Tree National Monument





Today I drove to Joshua Tree. Unlike other National Parks that I have visited, there are no concession stands and no visitors' centers inside the park. And because it is the end of the fall season, the park was empty. Silence. Only the sound of the wind. And the strange beauty of the Joshual trees against the jumbled rock formations that tumble out of the earth.

I took the 'Boy Scout Trail' which I followed until I could no longer see the road....a 360 panorama. I bought a 12 month pass ($15 for the day, $30 for the pass) so I can come often, especially in February to see the wildflowers. Linnie, can we camp there in April for our birthdays?

On the way home, I stopped at the Harley store in Yucca Valley. I have been trying to discover just the right token to carry in my car. I found just what I was looking for...and to my delight, the perfect Chanukah gift for my father. It is a 'guardian bell.' The legend goes that the sound of this little bell dispels all evil spirits on the road and keeps you safe on your journey (especially if you are on a motorcycle). I bought two exactly the same: on one side there is a wolf, and on the other side two feathers. My bell is hanging from my rear view mirror.

It poured on the 2 1/2 hour ride home, but I listened to disc 5 of Deepak Chopra, and an hour of my old friend Howard Stern on Sirius! It is comforting to know that some things never change....

Storm or Tour

After downloading a wireless software update, my blackberry tour crashed. This was my big opportunity to trade it for the new blackberry storm 2. Although I love my tour, I do have big screen envy. Actually it is the iphone that I still yearn for, because when I ask the blackberry "is there an app for that?" the answer is usually 'no,' like lighting the chanakah lights on your phone.
Well, I read the reviews and I did go in to try the new and improved smart touch technology. Sad to say, it was still not something I could handle with ease. So I am sticking with my tour, and as a consolation, found the "ubertwitter" app, and you can follow me at 'barbra420' (because that is my birthday!)

Sunday, December 6, 2009

I Have a Car








Since returning from Mexico in 2003, I didn't have a car. I moved to San Francisco where a car is actually a burden. And the City!!! You can walk from one neighborhood to the next, or take a bus/Muni/Bart wherever. For those weekend visits down to Los Gatos, or up to Humboldt County, my friend Wayne at Dollar Rent a Car always set me up.

San Diego is a different story. I live downtown and my school (I am center director of an English Language Institute) is up the street. OK, I can walk to Borders, to the Gaslamp, to great cafes, and to the marina walkway. And yes, there is bus 901 for that 45 minute journey to Coronado.
So it is rent a car even to go to the doctor! Thank goodness CVS Pharmacy has food for when I am too tired after work to walk to the supermarket to buy what I can carry.

And my new passion, drumming....well my djembe is quite heavy, and I taxi or bus to Balboa Park (fantastic world beat center) for my lessons with Babacar. And then rely on the kindness of others to take me home. In fact, one thing I am grateful for has been the kindness of others....

But I am a free, spontaneous spirit and my spirit has been closing down.

Guess what!!! My father bought me a car!!!! This is the hugest act of generosity and caring ever! I am seeing the world through new eyes: it is like being born again........

Over Thanksgiving I picked up my little, loaded pre-owned certified Focus at Frontier Ford. Then, the OPEN ROAD. I drove to Orleans (between Redding and Eureka) to spend Thanksgiving with my daughter's husband's family, a true retreat, and the only boy in my life, sweet Sam who is now two.

And oh the ride home! I left at 5 a.m., a frosty morning, on my heated seats, listening and singing to Sinatra to my heart's content on my free 3 month Sirius! Down 101 though winding mountain roads, past Fort Bragg, and continuing though the harvested vineyards full of fall colors in Mendecino.

And my car has sync technology! That means I say a command: "Phone" "Call Mandi" And it does! And no more tickets for the one time I rented a car and had to answer my emergency school phone with a cop behind me and a cost of $457 (thank you Embassy) because I kept waiting for my white courtesy letter that I was told would tell me what to do.

So I know it sounds of no consequence, but yesterday I googlemapped Trader Joe's and drove there in the beautiful town of Hillcrest. It was a delight to go food shopping! I am grateful for the heirloom cherry tomatoes and the steamed beets and the hearts of palm and the fresh salad and the tasty salmon and the $1.99 bottle of savignon blanc!!!

Today I am going to drive across the Coronado Bridge, and know that I won't have to return the car tomorrow. I am going to walk on the path along the ocean. I am going to breathe the air and watch the waves. I am going to think of my mother and let her know of this wonderful kindness of my father. I am naming my car "Harley" after my Dad's love of motorcycles and his understanding of what it means "to go."

I am free again. I am independent. I am spontaneous. I am in the present moment. I am looking for adventure.......and whatever comes my way.

Thank you Daddy.